Drop the Weight!!!

Hello Curves,
I’m April, and I’m an emotional junk food eater. 
After having my daughter last year April and starting school in August, I gained a whole 35lbs. Out of all of my post pregnancies, I gained the most weight ever after my last baby girl. There was a host of contributing issues that came along with my stress eating; however, I would have never expected that I would have gained so much weight. 

  I moved from one state to another to be a little closer to family, mainly to be closer to one of my “best friends.” I also restarted and enrolled in a new Master of Social Work program. Meaning I had to start all over from scratch. In about three weeks after temporarily moving in at my ” best friend ” house, she and I fell out after 25 years of friendship. We walked right in a very uncomfortable and unethical situation ( that’s my school terms kicking in ). A position that I would never put anyone in, not even my enemy, but that’s another story.

On top of that, all my money was spent moving to a different state. I was dealing with postpartum; my baby was only two and a half months old. The master program that I was in totally misinformed me about all the program required. I was just a mess! I felt so bad about moving my family into this now horrible situation when we were doing good, like really good. The “best friend” was then trying to kick my family and me out knowing we didn’t have a place to go at the time; she was causing all type of havoc. 
Feeling alone, lost, confused, and broken is no place anyone wants to be. I cried all I needed to cry, I felt sad, angry, guilty, and shameful, so I ate my way through it. I didn’t even know that I gained so much weight until I went to the doctor and was weighed in. The little self-esteem I had left just plummeted straight through the floor. I eventually joined the gym and was trying to go at least times a week, and I ate healthy for about a month. I lost about 10 lbs, although I was inconsistent in a total of 3 months. I probably would have lost more weight if I was up late snacking while writing papers. 

After being stripped down to the core, God was there with us every step of the way. He sent several people to speak into my life, randomly, and they talked about my exact situation as well as spoke life into my family and me. I had to start at the very beginning; my foundation was being rebuilt. It has been so painful, but it’s also been the most rewarding lessons I have learned thus far. I am still learning, healing, and I am still going through some things because the consequences from the choices I made doesn’t go away because now I’m tired and say ok Lord I learned my lesson, so all the other stuff needs to go. It does not work that way. However, God has continuously been faithful and has been carrying us throughout this whole miserable ideal. He has been patient, merciful, and loving so much so that he allowed us to get our place without working after three months being at her house, I have been able to pay my bills on time every month. Other people that were being affected in that situation stepped up and helped us through all of that craziness.  Just enough; God has given us to get through every day but never a lack of anything. 

For the first time I know and learned how to praise God in the storm because in this storm I am finding my strength, I am discovering who I am, I am learning who God is in my life. Things that I have tried to ignore or have been ignorant about are being addressed. On those days and trust me it a lot of days when I don’t feel all that great, hopeless, and when those false identities start to rise. I could hear the Holy Spirit says that’s not true, that’s not you, I renamed you, I don’t know this person you keep bringing up, I don’t see what you’re talking about. My God I’m getting goosebumps writing this right now. 

Now I can say I am grateful for all what I have been through, even the weight gain. If all of that brought me closer to God, then I can no longer complain. Don’t get me wrong I’m trying to lose this weight, I have to finish school, and there are a lot of things my husband and I need to clean up in our personal and family lives. The ” best friend ” and I no longer talk, but I have forgiven her and pray for her every time she comes across my mind. We found a great church home, that we love.   However, the perspective is different this time. As I continued to go through this trial, I can’t wait to see the woman I will be at the end of this storm. I so heartedly trust that God will bring me through this storm better than ever because he never breaks his promises, Period! I hope that this passage has helped or bless someone one in continuing to push through whatever it is that you’re going through and trust God. Also, please continue to pray for my family and me as we move forward. Lastly, pray that I get this weight off. Thanks for reading, I love you and see you all on the next post. 

Photographer: Ivory Jackson Website: www.Lucivory.com Instagram: LUCIVORYPHOTOGRAPHY

Model : April Shari @passionbattlecurves @aprilshari

Outfit: Fabletics @Fabletics